I can still remember the exact moment I fell in love with John Updike. It was 10th Grade English class. The story was A&P. It took place in the '50s, in New England, in a grocery store! How could I relate?
By the fourth sentence I was hooked. The first three sentences were great, but that fourth.....
I didn't know you could say such things! I felt wicked, and wrong, and giggly. We were reading a story in school...that talked about girls' butts. Heaven.
I went on to devour Updike. The Rabbit series, of course. A Month of Sundays was always a favorite, and for some reason--though it was hardly his best reviewed--I always had a special place in my heart for Roger's Version.
I didn't find out he died until last night. I was a little sad. And outraged that more hasn't been said. You could make an argument that Updike is one of the 5 greatest American authors. Shouldn't he get a State Funeral?
If you're going to read one of his books, I hope I don't have to tell you to start with Rabbit, Run. If that doesn't grab you, the man isn't for you, and I don't know what to tell you.
But if you're going to start with a short story, I still recommend A&P. I just didn't know a short-story could do those things.
A week ago I posted a music video called "Calabria," saying I found it undeniably catchy, but couldn't for the life of me figure out what language the girl was singing. Since then I've learned a few things:
(no word yet on whether he can decipher Elvish)
1) The song is officially by "Enur, featuring Natasja." Clueless DJs across the country, too stupid to do a quick Wikipedia search, have been saying "Enur" as if that were a person. In fact, the person is actually called "Rune," and just used Enur as a backward alias. Rune is a Danish musician, known for his "house music" track Calabria, which comprises the "music" portion of the song below.
2) The singing/rapping is also by a Danish person, this time actually named Natasja. Things I found out about Natasja: 2.1) Her mother is Danish and her father is Sudanese 2.2) She considers herself to not only be a rapper, but a reggae singer. Apparently there is quite the market for that in Denmark. 2.3) She's freaking dead! I mean no disrespect, but I was already obsessing on the song. It wasn't only the lyrics that felt like I could almost understand them, but the way she looks in the video. When you watch it, ignore the bootylicious parts, and pay attention to when she simply looks back at us over her shoulder. [shudders delightfully] It should say something that I could care less about all the T&A, and instead am crazy about her looks. Then to find out she died last year before the song could become big.....I feel like a necrostalker. (Is that a word? It should be. This hasn't happened to me since Karen Carpenter.)
3) By far the most amazing....THE SONG IS IN FREAKING ENGLISH! Danish English, to be sure, but English nonetheless. I listened to the song while reading the lyrics, and much like Stairway to Heaven, I finally understood it. (Of course, equally like Stairway, if you showed me other lyrics, I might hear that too, so there's no proof just yet.)
(in case you're wavering on whether to watch the video)
Below I have the video again, along with the lyrics. Even more than Informer (by Snow) of the early '90s, this is the most unintelligible English song I think I've ever heard.
But man, am I obsessed.
Calabria 2008
LYRICS
Easy now no need fi(as in for) go down, easy now no need fi go down, rock that run that, this where we from (repeat 2x)
Whoop Whoop When you run come around, Cu(z) I kno ur the talk of the town yea (repeat 4x)
Easy now no need fi go down Just walk it gently and no break nah bone, Cool end-it-ly, you have a style of your own, Me never kno you saw ya master the saxsaphone
cause u sound like the talk of the town yea, imma lock u when u run come around yea, make me wobble, make me whole body bubble, an me no say ya trouble, when ya ready for the double, and n u hit that, no ti-na the mickle (as in nothing in the middle) play with it a lickle(as in little), why you so na tickle im tellin' you to, hit that no ti-na the mickle (as in nothing in the middle) stay with it a lickle(as in little), why you so na tickle im feelin' them (whoop whoop)
easy now no need fi go down, easy now no need fi go down, walk it gently and no break nah bone
Whoop Whoop When you run come around, Cu(z) I kno ur the talk of the town yea (repeat 4x)
Best shown overall, shiny and tall, One touch make a gal climb whoever you are, Brass hat, hatter(as in hotter) than fireball Whoop Whoop! You not small you not lickle(as in little) at all Dat touch, just dip on me mind yea The good feelin dip on rewind yea make me wobble, make me whole body bubble, an me no say ya trouble, when ya ready for the double, and n u hit that, no ti-na the mickle (as in nothing in the middle) play with it a lickle(as in little), why you so na tickle im tellin' you to, hit that no ti-na the mickle (as in nothing in the middle) stay with it a lickle(as in little), why you so na tickle im feelin' them
Walk it gently and no break nah bone
easy now no need fi go down, easy now no need fi go down, rock that run that, this where we from (repeat 2x)
Whoop Whoop When you run come around, Cu(z) I kno ur the talk of the town yea (repeat 8x)
Whooop Whooop!!!
Natasja's Myspace page, with several songs to listen to. None of them are as good as Calabria, but they are all sweet.
Very sad was I to hear of the death of Jeff Healey. As well as being a great musician for three decades I submit The Jeff Healey Band produced possibly one of the top ten slow-dance songs of all time in Angel Eyes. (Now we're definitely going to have to do a Top Ten List on that.)
Jeff actually has a new album coming out in a month, which should have renewed interest. (Kanye is kicking himself for not thinking of dying before his las album came out, instead of just using the suffering of Katrina victims to sell records. Next time, Kanye; next time.)
Dragon also reports that Healey was Canadian, but I find this highly dubious. Dragon thinks anyone who ever did anything Canadian, a trait she shares with most Canadians I met when living up there. (Their basic philosophy is:
Change Planes in Toronto + Accomplish Something Cool
=
Canadian
I hung out with Jeff many times, and he never mentioned being from Canada. I mean, it's possible he was just ashamed, or heck, maybe he never even knew, but in any rate, he never mentioned it. Back in the early '90s I tried to get Jeff to form a new band, combining his style of Blues with MoTown. I called it "Sexual Healy." However, Jeff just couldn't see it. As I recall, there were a lot of things Jeff could never see, as far-reaching vision was never his strong suit, but I loved him anyway.
Jeff was one of only a few people who could pull of a power-mullet. Of course, we told him mullets were cool, because that's what friends do, but somehow he made it work anyway.
I wanted to embed the music video for Angel Eyes, but You Tube went all Nazi on me. (You can see it here if you want.) Instead I have a live version Jeff did in Europe at some point. It's strangely unplugged, but pretty decent.
Hypey is forcing me to do some crappy list about when I die instead of working on my Internet porn site... so when you're lacking spectacular boobs to stare at, you know who to blame.
Last meal: fresh, hot yeast rolls from Golden Corral smothered in honey butter
Last restaurant: Golden Corral
Last movie: "Gunfight at the Golden Corral"
Last book: "The Yeast Roll Connection: A Medical Breakthrough" by William G. Crook
Last TV show: The Golden Corral Girls
Last game to play: Golden Corral Nugget Casino DS for Nintendo DS
Last Song: "Stay Golden Corral" by Au Revoir Simone
Last Piece of Art: a tattoo of this:
Last thing to write: an ode to honey butter
Last letter: Z
Last thing to do: your mama
Last Wish: more honey butter
Last Words: "Golden Corraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal.... gack."
