If I had to tell my grandmother this I would commit ritualistic sudoku

Over on Tracy Lynn's site is a strange hilarious strange confusing strange explanation of telling old people stuff. (Bear in mind when I read it a second time it wasn't all that strange, but this has been a tense night for me, and I honestly was stymied when I momentarily thought Tracy was a man. And a lesbian (now THAT'S a double dub.)

Anyway, the reason I mention it is that in the course of conversation Tracy had to tell old men how gay men consummate their marriages.

Tracy's words were--and I'm quoting here--

"....up the butt."

For reason I'll later on examine and wonder why, I jumped into the fray, leaving a comment explaining how the idea that most gay men have anal sex is a myth, since most actually have oral sex.

Tracy wrote back and said she knew that, but a lot of things had been happening then (read the post; priceless), and by the time the gay man question came up, she honestly didn't feel she could,

"...have possibly looked him in the eye and said they suck dick."

Okay, here's my question. Imagine your grandmother. Not one of those chain-smoking grandmas who know where all the good slot machines are at the Nugget and use the word "colored" a tad too often (and for the record I do not have a grandmother like that, but we all know of them), but the grandmothers who are sweet as pie and you're honestly not sure how she came to have your father because you're not sure she's ever even heard of sex, let alone had it; that grandmother.

Imagine you had to explain to that grandmother how gay marriages are consummated.

Which would be more difficult:

A) Up the butt

B) Sucking Dick

Hyperion "the consummator"