Typical of me, as soon as I'd written Kevin I realized how good that line was, so I am excerpting my own email:
"Finally, and this came as a shock to me when I moved to Canada, although if I'd only thought about it I should have known earlier, there is no such thing as "American cheese." First first week here I went into a grocery store and asked for it, only to have the deli girls laugh at me. "Honey," one said, "there is no American cheese." "Oh." I said, embarrassed. "Well, do you know what you call it?" Light Cheddar, I was told. In retrospect, that says so much. America has not to my knowledge invented any cheese. But we have the opportunity to brand one ours. The Swiss are surely set up with their tasty treat, and all know of great French cheeses, but what do we do? We take the blandest cheddar possible to call that American. Sad. Truly Sad. (I like this paragraph so much, with your permission I'll use it in Monkey Barn.)"
I'm sad, but you know who's sadder?