The Future

You know, we always laugh about what people said 50 years ago, like, "Rock and Roll is just a fad" and, "People will explode if they go any faster than the break-neck speed of 10 km/h" and, "No computer will ever be smaller than a cigarette lighter" (cigarette lighters were also enormous back then). Anyways, I'm weary of making any predictions about the future because I know that the bullies of the future will just make fun of me and totally hurt my feelings. For example, I was watching a commercial the other day and it said that in the future everyone will wear transitions lenses. I thought that was silly and I was going to say something about it, but then I thought that I might embarrass myself when in 50 years everyone is wearing transitions lenses, but also a sassy t-shirt with a quote of me saying "In 50 years, not many people will be wearing transitions lenses". I'm just afraid that in the future everyone will be walking on ceilings and wearing pants on their head, and then the trendiest magazines will make lists of the dumbest things ever said, and they will scoff, "Boy, listen to this quote by Elvis from Monkey Barn, 'Nobody will ever wear pants on their head. It's ridiculous.'" And I will look like a fool.