Friday, June 03, 2005

Tooth Brush Manifesto



It's the middle of the night and I just got up to use the bathroom. I decided to brush my teeth while I was up. I've been doing this a lot more lately. I just brushed them a couple of hours ago, but already my mouth tastes terrible, and sometimes a swig or two of water isn't cutting it. Does anyone else have this problem? Maybe it's the horrible air up here in Canada.

Anyway, it reminds me of this thing I read about tooth brushes awhile back. Hold on a minute and I'll get it: http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a990416.html

The gist is: wondering whether the toilet shoots up a fine mist after it's flushed, and therefore how far away one should keep the tooth brush.

Now, admittedly I've always had a little bit of a germ fetish. People who don't wash their hands after going to the bathroom: I think they should be killed. (And for the girl who wrote last night and asked me where I got my strong sense of social consciousness: take that!)

Okay, maybe I'm being a tad harsh, and with my refusal to ever dust I'm sure my mother would laugh at my cleanliness jihad, but when I comes to certain things I am adamant. And when I read this article, I moved my tooth brush. At first I put it in a drawer, inside a Ziploc baggie. However, I wasn't sure that process didn't create more germs itself. Now I keep the toothbrush in an entirely different room, which makes it inconvenient, but gives me more peace of mind.

What I don't get is: I've shared this information with others. And all I get back is scorn. Refusal to change their habits, and mockery for mine. I know I can be weird and fanatical, but explain this one to me: how is the guy who, oh, how do we put it--doesn't want feces all over his tooth brush!--the weird one?

1 comment:

cyble said...

I recall the horror I felt the first time I heard about the "fine mist" after flushing, I too am a germaphobe. While this didn't prompt me to move my toothbrush (I keep it on the other side of the sink anyway)I also have a question about the middle of the night mouth syndrome. Why do you suppose it is that on nights when I brush before bed my mouth actually tastes and feels worse in the morning than it does the morning after I am too lazy to bother? Trust me, you're not wierd, I have become super obsesive about keeping the lid down during flushing... gross!