I meant what I said and I'm not backing down. I spend several hours a day preparing for this site, and even more hours getting ready for the new launches. I don't ask for a whole lot, and don't think it's unreasonable to expect some help when I do ask. The same few people shouldn't have to carry the load. I mark my traffic daily, and a whole lot more people are coming each day.
All I asked was for some one (not named Ajax, Koz, Scapedragon, Harriet, Quincy or Dominique) to email me a bar joke. That's all.
But it's been 48 hours since I threw down the gauntlet.
And nothing.
Well, I give in most of the time, let it go, but here is my line in the sand. I'm not posting any more new content on this site until my simple request is met. I'm not posting anything today until it is, which means the top ten list, the brand new column, the movie index, the tales and all the posts for here sit in "draft" mode, unpublished.
I may relent and move on with the other sites tomorrow (if a settlement hasn't been reached by then), but THIS SITE will remain dormant.
And if nothing comes in by Monday? Well, then I guess I'll have to explore the nuclear option.
NOVEMBER IS BAR JOKE MONTH
That is all.
5 comments:
Since there is a Mexican Standoff, and we all need some new material to read, I thought it would be appropriate to post some Mexican Jokes. Arriba.
Q: What were the 2 Mexican FireFighting Brother's names?
A: Hose A and Hose B
Jose arrives at the Mexican border on his bike with 2 huge bags over his shoulders. The guard stops him and asks: "What's in the bags?"
"Senior, It's only sand." replies Jose.
"Sand??? Well, we'll just see about that - get off the bike!"
The guard takes the bags, rips them open, empties them out and finds nothing in them...except sand. Detaining Jose overnight, the sand is analysed, but only to discover it is in fact simply sand.
Jose is released, the sand is put into new bags and placed on Jose's shoulders, and he is let across the border.
Next day, same thing happens. The guard asks: "What you got there?"
"Sand," says Jose.
A thorough examination of the bags again shows there to be nothing but sand, and subsequently Jose is allowed to ride across the border.
For a whole year this continues until one day Jose doesn't show up, and the guard discovers him in a Cantina in Mexico.
"Hey, Bud," says the guard, "I know you're smuggling something. For a year it's driven me crazy. It's all I can think about... I can't get sleep, the kids are getting neglected...heck, even the dog senses I'm beginning to lose it! Between you and me, just what are you smuggling?"
Jose sips his beer, smiles and replies: "Bicycles..."
Aimara, a Mexican maid announced to her Boss Mr Blanco and his wife that she was quitting. When asked why, she replied, "I'm in the family way."
The wife was totally surprised and shocked, and asked who it was.
The maid replied, "Your husband and your son."
Mrs Blanco was mortified and demanded an explanation.
"Well," Aimara explained, "I go to the library to clean it and your husband say, 'You are in the way'. I go to the living room to clean and your son say 'You are in my way'. So I'm in the family way and I quit."
This Mexican dude was taking a pee on the side of a building and this Texan sees him. After the Mexican is done the texan bloke asks him, "How come you Mexicans don't wash your hands after you pee?"
The Mexican smiles, "Senior, we Mexicans don't piss in our hands..."
A big tough Mexican man married a good-looking Mexican lady and after the wedding, laid down the following rules:
"Honey, I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want - and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you otherwise. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozin, and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules! Any comments?"
His lovely new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there'll be sex here at eight o'clock every night - whether you're here or not."
Did you hear about the Mexican who threw his wife over a cliff?
When the police officer asked him why he'd done it he said, "Tequila! Tequila!"
What kind of cans are there in Mexico?
Mexicans.
Because I just watched Mulholland Drive, I give you: Roy Orbison's, 'Crying', en Espanole!
Tenía todo razón por un rato que podría sonreír por un rato ENTONCES vi usted ayer por la noche usted llevó a cabo mi mano tan apretada CUANDO usted paró para decir hola usted deseaba que bien usted no podría decir que yo ha estado gritando sobre usted, gritando encima usted y usted me dijo "tan de largo" a la izquierda que estaba parado todo solamente, solamente y el griterío, gritando, gritando, gritando él es duro de entender pero el tacto de su mano puede comenzarme a gritar ¿Pensé que encima usted pero es verdad, así que verdad te quiero aún más que yo hizo antes solamente el querido, qué puede yo hacer? Para usted no me ame y gritaré siempre sobre usted, gritando sobre usted Sí ahora le van y a partir de este momento encendido, seré gritador, gritando, gritando, gritando sí, gritando, gritando sobre usted
Sorry about the punctuation and grammar. ;-)
Okay Mexican stand off + bar joke =
A Mexican is strolling down the street in Mexico City and kicks a bottle laying in the street.
Suddenly, out of the bottle comes a Genie.
The Mexican is stunned and the Genie says, "Hello master, I will grant you one wish, anything you want."
The Mexican begins thinking, "Well, I really like drinking tequila." Finally the Mexican says, "I wish to drink tequila whenever I want, so make me piss tequila."
The Genie grants him his wish. When the Mexican gets home he gets a glass out of the cupboard and pisses in it. He looks at the glass and it's clear.
Looks like tequila. Then he smells the liquid. Smells like tequila. So, he takes a taste and it is the best tequila he has ever tasted.
The Mexican yells to his wife, "Consuela, Consuela, come quickly!"
She comes running down the hall and the Mexican takes another glass out of the cupboard and pisses into it. He tells her to drink it.
Consuela is reluctant but goes ahead and takes a sip.It is the best tequila she has ever tasted. The two drink and party all night.
The next night the Mexican comes home from work and tells his wife to get two glasses out of the cupboard. He proceeds to piss in the two glasses.
The result is the same, the tequila is excellent and the couple drink until the sun comes up.
Finally Friday night comes and the Mexican comes home and tells his wife, "Consuela grab one glass from the cupboard and we will drink tequila."
His wife gets the glass from the cupboard and sets it on the table. The Mexican begins to piss in the glass and when he fills it his wife asks him, "But Pancho, why do we need only one glass?"
Pancho raised the glass and says, "Because tonight, my love, you drink from the bottle!!"
A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He finishes his drink and goes back outside. He finds his horse missing. He goes back into the bar and states, "If my horse isn't back by the time I finish another drink, I'm going to have to do what I did the last time my horse was stolen. And I don't want to have to do that again." So he orders an another drink and finishes it. When he goes oustide again, he finds his horse back. As he is leaving, a guy comes up to him and asks, "What was it that you did the last time your horse was stolen?" The man replies, "I had to walk home."
pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel stuck to his zipper, the bartender is surprised, he asks : "Dear sir, do you know you have a steering wheel attached to your willy?"
The pirate says: "ARRRRRRR, it's driving me nuts"
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